jewelfox: A portrait of a female anthropomorphic fox, with a pink jewelled pendant and a cute overbite. (Default)

This is a response to 'Hello, my name is Ally' -- how children are being exploited by YouTube predators.

The link goes into slightly graphic detail about fetish material. This short essay discusses in broad terms what's happened to me and to others, but is not itself graphic.

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jewelfox: A portrait of a female anthropomorphic fox, with a pink jewelled pendant and a cute overbite. (Default)

I have a friend whose father was a migrant worker and an associate of Cesar Chavez, who will be remembered at the judgement bar for lifting up the lowest of people, who contribute to our economy in the form of cheap produce.

I have several friends who have been the victims of sexual assault, (it’s that common) and who are triggered to varying degrees by the campaign remarks and actions and final election of a sexual predator.

I know a Syrian refugee family in the first weeks of adjustment to their new life in Arizona who found death threats from an anonymous neighbor, for whom many of us made an effort to encourage them that not all their neighbors would wish them evil.

My friends are devastated that the misogynist, racist, religious bigot candidate squeaked by to be elected, and fearful of newly empowered racists, misogynists, and religious bigots at large. Anyone who wants to tell them they should ‘get over it’ already will have to get through me first. We all know that we must move forward somehow come January 20. Grieving is part of some folks’ preparation. Compassion is a duty too.

-- MDearest, comment on Zelophehad's Daughters essay

jewelfox: A portrait of a female anthropomorphic fox, with a pink jewelled pendant and a cute overbite. (Default)

The actual results from my last visit to the endocrinologist were disappointing. I got an increase to my estradiol (synthetic estrogen) prescription, and I'm currently in between providers because I just recently moved.

That's not what this entry is about, though. I was sexually abused by a psychiatrist via Skype, or at least teleconferencing, this Wednesday, in front of [personal profile] burning_ground and clinic staff. :P What follows is a transcript of the complaint that I sent to this state's medical board, slightly edited to remove identifying information.

Content Note: Transphobia liek whoa, and entitled white cismale douchebags thinking they get to know what your sexual characteristics are, for zero medical benefit.

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And that's why we've been quiet the past few days. Hope you're all having fun watching AGDQ. :P

jewelfox: A portrait of a female anthropomorphic fox, with a pink jewelled pendant and a cute overbite. (Default)

The other day, an evil man named Boyd Packer died.

(EDIT: Corrected some things after re-reading quotes, and changed the description of this person's legacy.)

He was one of the highest leaders of the Mormon church, called an apostle. Apostles are appointed to their positions for life, and he spent most of his tenure saying hateful things to captive audiences.

In 2010, he gave a talk in worldwide General Conference where he said God would never make someone gay. The line was edited out when his talk was published in print and online, but not soon enough to keep the rate of LGBT suicides in the state of Utah from spiking right afterwards.

When I was a young adult, I was given a pamphlet that was a printout of one of his talks, in which he condemned people for masturbating and said that it was okay to deck gay people who come on to you. Partly because of this man's words, I hated myself for more than a decade, and came very close to taking my life.

He called gays, feminists, and intellectuals the enemies of the Mormon church, and famously declared in a talk to church educators that "some things which are true are not useful." I feel like that sums up his legacy. The things he proclaimed as true are already being thrown out by the institutional Mormon church, because they are not very useful in making them look good. In fact, they make them look pretty damned awful, to anyone with a conscience and even a basic understanding of how words affect others.

I'm glad he lived long enough to see his victims turn the tables on him, and win.

If you want a more vivid look at how I felt because of this man, read this story.

jewelfox: A portrait of a female anthropomorphic fox, with a pink jewelled pendant and a cute overbite. (Default)

That's how my father of origin responded when I came out to him as bisexual. And this is really how a lot of conservative religious types see sexual orientation and gender identity. They think it's something you choose to do, because sex.

Content note: This post talks about sexual shame and homophobia, and contains links to discussions of rape and child solicitation.

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jewelfox: A portrait of a female anthropomorphic fox, with a pink jewelled pendant and a cute overbite. (Default)

(Content note: Talking about abusive religion, sexual abuse, and homophobia. Also being tired and miffed and rambling. We're feeling really out of it after the last few days.)



If you go to (or have gone to) church, how hard would it be (or have been) for you to leave it? How much would you be asked to justify yourself? Is "thanks, but this isn't for me" okay for them? Do they wish you well with wherever life takes you?

The Mormon church, which I used to be in, has a special word for people who leave it: apostate. It basically means "someone who turned their back on the truth, even though they still know that it's true." And they tell stories about people who left their church early on over what are made out to be really petty reasons, like having their name misspelled or a disagreement over how much cream they were allowed to take from a cow's milking.

The anecdotes don't bear much resemblance to these people's actual exit stories. But what's more disturbing, to me, is the fact that Mormons (and the same goes for people in other abusive religions or belief systems) don't consider these reasons good enough to leave.

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About us

~ Fox | Gem | Rei ~

We tell stories, paint minis, collect identity words, and share them all with our readers. If something we write helps you, let us know.

~ She / her ~

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