jewelfox: A portrait of a foxgryphon with a beak, black fur, magenta hair, fox ears, and a neckband with a large jewel on it. (Default)
I feel like nothing I did for them last year amounts to anything. Except for "The JavaScript beginner pages were lacking eight tutorials that are available in Python and Vala," and one person's comments on their blog (which I can't find right now) about how strange I was and how I discussed inappropriate things at Open Help.

I feel like all I did was get them to subsidize my lifestyle and my depression, and give me a stage from which to preach controversy and argue with real GNOME users and contributors. I can't believe they spent so much to ship me to another state so I could have a depressive episode and embarrass them all in public, and let me say the embarrassing things that I did on their aggregator.

I shouldn't have applied to their program, I shouldn't have promised to do anything afterwards, I shouldn't have continued to blog there when I was doing nothing for them, and I shouldn't have tried to do something so out of my league. I'm a terrible fox, and it was wrong of me to pretend to be anything else.

I deleted the tag, and filed a bug report to be removed. I should delete all the entries I posted. I'll get around to that later.

I'm sorry. I don't know how to deal with depression, and I shouldn't have made myself out to be someone they ought to bring along when I'm dealing with it. I'm also completely inept socially and very easily scarred, and shouldn't have gone to their in-person event to begin with.

Stuff

Nov. 23rd, 2012 02:54 am
jewelfox: A portrait of a foxgryphon with a beak, black fur, magenta hair, fox ears, and a neckband with a large jewel on it. (Default)
I guess we're still alive, despite our better judgment.

Read more... )

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We tell stories, paint minis, collect identity words, and share them all with our readers. If something we write helps you, let us know.

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