jewelfox: A portrait of a foxgryphon with a beak, black fur, magenta hair, fox ears, and a neckband with a large jewel on it. (Default)

That's from the comic "Your Black Friend," which Homeworld / Sword of the Stars writer Arinn Dembo reviews on her blog.

I'm reblogging this quote for truth. When I started becoming aware of systemic injustice is when I started being held at even more of a distance. My family and church didn't know what to do with me, and could only tell me to "stop reading those things." Individual people would come up and thank me, sometimes, after I spoke up on others' behalf in Institute, or tried to make sure that someone was okay. But to anyone who had any kind of power or privilege in White Mormon culture, I vanished except as an annoyance.

On the plus side, most White Mormon people are kind of boring anyway, except when their scandals show up in the newspaper. Being around other trans women and "woke" friends has been very good for me.

(About the word "woke:" Arinn notes that it has been appropriated by white people to mean "sensitive and aware," when it was originally used by black people to mean "alert to potential danger." She discusses the need for such a term, in a society that's even more hostile to people with black skin than it is to me personally.)

jewelfox: A portrait of a foxgryphon with a beak, black fur, magenta hair, fox ears, and a neckband with a large jewel on it. (Default)

In the human social circles we've been inside, there is enormous stigma against saying that you've been hurt, especially by someone who's part of the circle.

The assumption is that you've brought it on yourself. You chose to take offence. You chose to be victimized, or your choices left you susceptible to it. You now choose to play the victim, and it has to be a role that you play because no real victims exist. Not here, not in our circle, not as a result of our kind.

The second-fastest way to lose friends is to point out who they victimize.

The fastest way to lose friends is to require them to take responsibility for having hurt you. Especially if you're too hurt by them to do it in a polite way, because politeness is the social grease that's smeared over violence to mask it.

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~ Fox | Gem | Rei ~

We tell stories, paint minis, collect identity words, and share them all with our readers. If something we write helps you, let us know.

~ She / her ~

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